It is a day when compulsion is getting the better of me. I have plenty of work to do, and a clear list written, setting out my day, task by task. But after breakfast, I spend too much time checking s and Twitter in that first crucial hour, and so, throughout the rest of the morning I am distracted.

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Years old: 31

Craig is a banker from Iowa who became addicted to adult chat rooms. I wasted hours looking for cybersex, finding the right cyberlover, and the right fantasy for the moment. Typing used to be great, but recently I started to phone sex making the sex part real and part fantasy. The real scary part for me is that I like cybersex better than having sex with my wife.

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I remember the day after, when my flatmate asked me how it went.

About

Bill and Christine called my office deeply distraught about their fifteen year- old daughter, Shannon.

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They had caught her sexting with her boyfriend. That is, She was taking nude photos of herself with her cell phone camera and ing them to her boyfriend.

Women and cybersex

Everyone does it. More women are getting trapped in this addiction. One third of all visitors to pornographic websites are women. Although more women are viewing online pornography like men, most are not aroused by it.

The cybersex addiction index (cai)

This is because women are not as visually stimulated as men. Women are more relationally stimulated. They are also the ones who often plan family holidays and vacations. Because of their attraction to relationships, many women are becoming addicted to social media outlets for sexual purposes. For example, in chat rooms, a woman can be anyone she wants to be, and she can get into very sexual chats with men.

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She and her chat partner create extremely vivid sexual fantasies with words and possibly photos or video. In essence, she is writing her own romance novel and she is the heroine.

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Just like most addictions where a tolerance develops, for some women words on a screen are soon not satisfying enough. At this point, a young woman might engage in sexting where she s pornographic photos as well as text to men. A young woman might also use a webcam where her chat partner can now see her.

She can now participate in webcam sex.

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This addiction can also be extremely physically dangerous for women. Studies have shown that women are much more willing to physically meet the men they have encountered online. Thus, while a woman may think she sex be having a romantic rendezvous at a local hotel with a wonderful man she met online, she want really be meeting a serial rapist or killer.

Although lonely men are addicted to Internet pornography, this addiction can be far more dangerous for women. While most women who become addicted to Internet cyber are using the venues listed above, there is a growing population of young women who are local addicted to the visual chat that men view. This is also fueled by their desire for a relationship. When men view porn, what they usually focus on are body parts and sex acts. However, when these women view porn, what they often see is a relationship being expressed sexually.

This concerns me, because the sex portrayed in porn is not the healthy sex one would find in a healthy marriage.

When fantasy turns into obsession

It is often a depiction of a man violently using a woman for his own selfish pleasure. So to all the parents out there, you must protect your daughters. Be sure to monitor all their use of technology.

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Make sure they are not using technology for any sexual purposes. Internet monitoring software such as Covenant Eyes can help.

Educate your daughters on the dangers of the Internet. There are many sexual predators who want to lure young women into their traps.

We need to make sure young women are safe in cyberspace. Shannon admitted she sexted to keep her boyfriend. Thus, what she really wanted was a relationship. Deep down Shannon did not want to exploit herself for a relationship. She felt trapped in a no-win situation. In addition to teaching Shannon about Internet safety, Bill and Christine worked with Shannon to teach her about healthy relationships, intimacy and sexuality.

She soon came to realize that any boyfriend who would dump her for not being sexual was not worth dating after all.

Although it was difficult because of peer pressure, Shannon decided to wait. In the end she was glad she made this decision. Image via FlickrCC 2. Logo added. Peter C. Kleponis, Ph. He holds an M. Kleponis has over 18 years of professional experience working with individuals, couples, families and organizations.

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He is also a regular guest on Relevant Radio's On-Call program. Kleponis travels throughout the country educating people on how to win the battle against pornography through his Fighting Porn in Our Culture…and Winning!

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Kleponis is also founder of the Integrity Starts Here Catholic recovery program for pornography and sexual addiction. He works with individuals and couples from around the United States and internationally in-person, by phone, and by Skype. For more information see his website, www. Protecting Our Daughters from Cybersex. The Progression of the Addiction Just like most addictions where a tolerance develops, for some women words on a screen are soon not satisfying enough. Protecting Young Women So to all the parents out there, you must protect your daughters.

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Share this Post. Peter Kleponis Peter C. Leave a Comment Cancel Comment. Search for:. Latest Posts.

The progression of the addiction

Recent Comments. All Rights Reserved. Integrity Restored is a ministry of Stewardship: A Mission of Faith, a c 3 non profit organization. We believe everything in our lives is a gift that has been entrusted to us by God to help others.

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