I've been the leader all my life. I need a woman, not a little girl.

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Re-read your post. A life in which you had no part.

And there are ongoing relationships from this life in which you your petty jealousy has no bearing. In fact, your role, as the jealous girlfriend, is basiy a perturbance.

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You haven't earned it. You can't just exert yourself into a preexisting life and expect your mere presence to change the course of history. That's not how it works.

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You need to get your head out of your ass and gain some perspective on this. He is not doing wrong by you or by his girls by providing for them in the way that he is. Probably less, given how most family phone plans break down.

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This, the lunches, the braces and the school supplies etc. Your real problem is your not feeling like you have a place in this life and guess what? You don't. Your role is to build new memories, a new set of circumstances in which you DO have a place, and affect, and some consequence NOT obsessing over his past and the fact that you weren't there.

Get over it. Be supportive be grateful that the you've found is a provider for his regardless of his last relationship not working out.

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By dwelling on his past and making horribly ill-formed stories up for yourself about what's 'appropriate' or not and deluding yourself with these deep-seated jealousies, you're precluding your relationship's ability to grow. Can you say, "sabotage"?

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That's what you're doing to yourself. And really, this all speaks more to your own issues with yourself, than it does to any issues you might p to have with his ex, his, him, or however so sets of braces. You need to get right with yourself before you can be in this, or any, relationship.

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